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 Shooting star

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rhymarhyma
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rhymarhyma

Posts : 549
Join date : 2011-08-11
Location : Denver, CO

Shooting star Empty
PostSubject: Shooting star   Shooting star EmptySat Dec 17, 2011 3:02 pm

Shooting star, shooting star

how I wonder what you are

Sometimes you're so very close

other times so far


When you're close, I hold you tight

I don't want you to go

I long to see you every night

more than you can know

The way you glow, the way you shine

I swear I feel your heat

I prayed one day you would be mine

and make my life complete


Midnight sky, midnight sky

my shooting star's so high

So beyond my outstretched reach

I have to say goodbye


My shooting star, you shot too high

Now what am I to do

I can't stay and watch you die

I have too much love for you

I tried to rein you in, my love

I did what I thought right

But you were happy high above

so please be safe tonight


Brand new day, brand new day

all I can do is pray

that tonight my star still shines

and didn't fade away


Last edited by rhymarhyma on Sat Dec 17, 2011 3:32 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Lora
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Lora

Posts : 5907
Age : 53
Join date : 2011-07-26
Location : Southern CA

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PostSubject: Re: Shooting star   Shooting star EmptySat Dec 17, 2011 3:22 pm

Love the metaphor. Awesome work!
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oneagleswings
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Posts : 4323
Age : 64
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PostSubject: Re: Shooting star   Shooting star EmptySat Dec 17, 2011 6:15 pm

beautiful....(sniff)

allergies...
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rhymarhyma
WRITERS’ MENTOR (500 + posts)
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rhymarhyma

Posts : 549
Join date : 2011-08-11
Location : Denver, CO

Shooting star Empty
PostSubject: Re: Shooting star   Shooting star EmptySat Dec 17, 2011 8:37 pm

Right on! I wrote this for my ex-wife. Her demon, in the form of drugs and alcohol, is strong. All prayers for her are much appreciated.
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Lora
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Lora

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PostSubject: Re: Shooting star   Shooting star EmptySat Dec 17, 2011 10:23 pm

That's a heart breaking one to deal with. I'll definitely keep her in my prayers.
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scottn
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scottn

Posts : 121
Join date : 2011-12-13

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PostSubject: Re: Shooting star   Shooting star EmptySun Dec 18, 2011 1:36 am

The poem seemed to be about a drug addict, shooting up all the time to get high. The speaker in the poem is in love but helpless as he or she does not participate. But still admires the addict, almost like an enabler an in the end has to let go.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts, not sure if that is really what the poem is about.

Scott
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rhymarhyma
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rhymarhyma

Posts : 549
Join date : 2011-08-11
Location : Denver, CO

Shooting star Empty
PostSubject: Re: Shooting star   Shooting star EmptySun Dec 18, 2011 7:20 am

Yeah. Heroin. I love her to death, and even though I grew up seeing a lot of things a child should never see, although I just assumed it was normal since the entire neighborhood was the same, I have to make sure my kids don't witness such madness. Sadly, I had to make a choice. And I chose my children. I have to clarify real quick; ex-wife and kids' mom are two different women. I write about both of 'em because I love both of 'em. Always will. Peace
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Lora
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PostSubject: Re: Shooting star   Shooting star EmptySun Dec 18, 2011 3:51 pm

Oh, that clears up a lot for me. There are two different women. Good to know.
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