Einstein the Possum

By
Jan Phillips

I live in an area that is not quite country but not quite city, so there are lots of different animals that are seen around. The largest population is probably the skunks, but that is a whole different story. There are coyotes, bob cats, geese, rabbits, raccoons, and the smaller version of rodents like rats and mice. That population has been greatly reduced by the amount of cats that people sometimes drop off in the neighborhood so it is not the problem in once was.

This story revolves around one particular critter known as the opossum. I have yet to give it a name, but I think I must as it is quite different from others of its kind. I would see it occasionally late at night on the porch eating what the cats left, but it never bothered me nor was it particularly scared when I came out on the porch. It never ran, just politely removed itself from my proximity. I began to worry when it started appearing in the morning around 10:00 or 11:00 A.M. I thought it might be rabid and so prayed and those appearances soon stopped.

I thought maybe it had found a new source of food or home until one evening after I had cooked on the grill which is also on my back porch. When I walked out the door, there was an awful commotion directly to my right and the possum had been climbing up the grill to get to the drip pan. That time it did get in somewhat of a hurry given the fact that I was yelling at the top of my lungs and there ensued a battle of sorts for territory. I won!

In writing this story and contemplating his or her actions, I have decided its name should be Einstein. Not because of the way it looks, although I am not so sure it looks like every other possum I have ever seen. Of course, I haven’t seen that many so am no expert. I just think it is smarter than the average possum so hence the name “Einstein”.

Einstein disappears for days and sometimes weeks and I never see it again. I have no clue where it goes or why it does not show up even at night to eat left over cat food. Then I decide to cook something on the grill, and Einstein suddenly appears that night. Now how it knows I have grilled is a question I cannot answer as sometimes even I don’t know until the last minute. Then I find it climbing up to the little drip pan and the battle rages once again with me yelling and brandishing a broom or whatever comes to hand and it looking at me as though I have lost my mind and then slowly going its own way. Needless to say, I have to clean my grill very well before I decide to cook on it again. Who knows what other critters my have taken lessons from Einstein.

The problem has now escalated to epic proportions as Einstein has now found a way to get inside the grill where you cannot see him. It was sometime ago after I cooked, I was outside (I love the outdoors) and I heard a strange noise coming from the grill. I opened the grill and there was Einstein just looking at me. I tried to shoo him out of the grill, but he was having none of that, so I went and got my broom and gave him a none to genteel swat on his backside. He did move then, but not like he was afraid. Did I mention he thinks behind the grill is his own private bathroom?

I know how he gets in the grill. There is about a two inch wide place across the back which accommodates the top when opened. But now my problem is how to keep him out of there. I am still working on that. Meanwhile, he still knows when I cook so the battle will rage on until I am smart enough to know what to put up there to keep him out. So far my ideas have been slim to none, but I swear I will not be defeated by a possum.

I don’t know how the fat little fella can get though that narrow opening. He is quite chunky. Since I have not cooked out in a while I thought maybe he would give up and go elsewhere, but not so! He thought he was being sneaky, but when I went outside the other day, I saw his tail disappearing off the back porch where the cat food usually sets. I’m sure he thought he was hidden, but I would recognize that tail anywhere.

I am still looking for a solution and I’m sure I will find one. I refuse to be defeated by Einstein the possum or any other of the many critters I have living around my house. God has blessed me with something to occupy my mind and my life is never dull with things going on all the time. He knows what I need before I need it. Glory be to God for making all living creatures.

I can picture you whacking away at that ol' Einstein. Who does he think he is anyway? Great short story Miss Cleo. You do know how to keep one entertained.

i love einstein...yay einstein!!
great story...love your stories!!
einstein stew?

Think I may grill tomorrow night. Wonder if Einstien will put in an appearance?

yum...grilled'possum!!

Waiting for more einstein the possum.

Me too!

Not sure who I feel sorrier for...Einstein...or you dear Ms. Jan..

Thanks for sharing.. keep us posted!!

Not to worry about Einstein. He has either learned his lesson or grown too much to fit through the small space into the grill. He now comes up and eats any of the cat food left over. He does not appear to be losing any weight. He is also not very afraid so I guess he feels safe.

sounds like a pretty cool pet to me? even has a cool name. i think he is very fond of you and thankful, he's not going anywhere anytime soon...LOL!

Seems none of the critters around the place are afraid of me. Even the rabbits don't run as long as I don't get too close. Guess they know I am too kind hearted and couldn't kill them anyway.