Quiet time
2 Cor. 12:7
Referring to the thorn in Paul's flesh. We often wonder what that thorn was and yet Paul desires for us to know why it was given him.
For us to fully understand The Lord we must at times become weak and not always be strong. 2 Cor. 12:9 talks about God's grace being sufficient for us as power is made through weakness. These verses teach us that Paul needed to remember that Gods power was greater than his and if he did not become weak he would never understand the full extent of Gods strength and power. The scripture says he learned to delight in weakness, in insult, in hardship, in persecutions, and in difficulties. For when we are weak, we become strong.
So, what is our true view of this scripture. Do we always try to just be strong or do we deal with the battles that are brought our way and allow the power of God to work through our weaknesses? Sometimes we are viewed negatively if we come across as weak in our faith, or weak in our walk. Most people want to see us strong all of the time and they get tripped out if they see us any other way. Through my weaknesses and my shortcomings they have been the times I have grown the most. What do you consider your thorn in your flesh? We have one, are we in touch with that and do we continue to strive to work to overcome it. Are we relaying on God to get us through these times or just looking inward. Paul's example is powerful and yet at times overlooked. Understanding our own inadequacies will push us more toward God for guidance and strength.
Self-Reliance
2 Chron. 20:12 We have no power to face the vast army that is attacking us. We do not know what to do, but our eyes are upon you..
Do we try to figure things out on our own and make do with what we have come up with and put on a act of strength when inside we are desiring for God to fix it? We find it hard to surrender control over to him for assistance.
Has there been a time in your life were everyone in your life was gone and only God was left? That concept isn't something we think of because we tend to for the most have someone in our life to be there. What would this look like to you? How would you handle life with no one else being there except you and God.
God will sometimes take things away from us so that we rely on him. Does it have to come to this in our lives or can we look to him and allow him to be the leader of our path.
It is easy to rely on the sources he provides around us, family, friends, church and yet the reality of this is that if none of these tools of support were there would we truly rely on god to get us through. Are we dropping to our knees and crying out to him for help.
Right now today in this moment, this week has been a week of God revealing were I have fallen short in my walk with him. Without realizing it, I have allowed my wall to come back to the surface. My guard has been up, my fears have caused me to begin to pull away and the desire to want to hide has been slowly creeping back. I have been stuffing my feelings as a means of protection and have been afraid to talk about the pains in my heart.
Until this study I did not see that as sin, since I was confessing my struggles with things, this didn't seem as if it were sin as much as a guard. Yet, as Paul worked to understand his thorn, this week God has worked to reveal my thorn. It isn't in my sin, it is hiding my fears, it is in stuffing my feelings, it is my wall of protection as not to be hurt or judged. These have been my demons that were revealed this week.
This time right now represents a fresh start, a new beginning, a cleansing. This week God showed me I was trying to do it alone. Not only was it about not trusting him, it was and is about not trusting my friends, not trusting the ones he has put in my life to help me grow, to be stronger, to be committed. It took all week until yesterday for me to see what he wanted me to see. Finally, I got it. And now am reaching out for help, am being vulnerable and saying what is in there. Now a time of healing for my spirit. For strength to be renewed and for me to know and believe with all my heart that he is there and that he does provide and it is up to me to seek it. His word teaches, it defines who we need to be. It opens our heart to the reality that we are not always strong and we must be weak at times to get to the next level. In these areas it has been revealed I am weak. Am ready to be stronger, am ready to share the fears, the hurts, the trying to understand this path and road that is being traveled and what it means. To follow the example of Christ. To see Paul's journey as my journey. To remember what my thorn is and to allow it to lead me to the foot of the cross with each step and choice that is made.
This is my heart today......
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